Welcome to MiGC 2

I'm doing this to record some of funniest and weirdest moments in my class..Sometimes it becomes impossible to sit in the class as your intelligence gets insulted a lot but at the same time you dont want to miss out on the unintentional hilarity of certain situations in class..so here goes..This is a typical day in the class in Migc 2(that's my class)..
Enter "a wanna stay young old man" (my chemistry lecturer-who even dyes the hair growing on his ear lobe!) the moment we see him near the door,everyone lets out a very audible groan but he nonchalantly walks inside,comes near the teacher's table puts his both hands on the table and waits for everyone to stop talking,which obviously never happens.He pounds the duster on the table real hard n then everyone unwillingly shuts up.Now his standard dialogue-"Waat wus we doing in the pruveeos klais?" See amma..dont maik noise..I'm taiking so mach paain fur you peepul..egjaams are fasht yepproching..yevirday you musht go home,read aal my notses and write without seeing..then you peepul will becum furfect..I'm saying this as yoover brother" (yeah right!)
I simply stare at him wondering whether I'm back in kindergarten..I resort to my standard expressionless face, scribbling something in my notebook which resembles the ECG..I wonder how the creatures sitting in the front benches,yes creatures,not only manage to stay awake but also manage to maintain upto date notes with margins,highlighting imp sentences et al..another peculiar trait exhibited by these species is their 95% above attendance at any given period of time...they will never give proxy,they pride themselves in always being on time to the class..bunking a class is a sin in their dictionary n they will glare at you if you happen to make fun of any lecturer in the class..What a life?? Well its none of my business..maybe they have their own reasons for being the way they are and I'm no one to judge that..but still..whatever! Lets drop it! Coming back to my sir,he starts explaining the topic for the day and it seems as though time has stopped moving..the watch seems to have stopped functioning and my eyelids simply refuse to stay in place threatening to close down any minute and then all of a sudden i hear him say this(pardon the abusive language) "Iron whore is a mineral whore,I'll give u a list of whores(ores) come prepared tomorrow!!" My mind went blank after this sentence,like the static you hear when you are trying to tune to your radio channel. I was stupified,all my drowsiness vanished in an instant..I look at my friends wondering whether they heard the same thing I heard but they were too busy sleeping..I was just speechless and in a state of shock trying to digest what i had just heard, i was too shocked to laugh..rest of the period i was just staring at him thinkin whether he really knew what he was talkin in the class..then finally the time for taking attendance had come..the sole reason for my being present in the class!! attendance!! The coll authorities had shown me hell because of my low attendance..so my only aim in life right now is to get my attendance above the dreaded 75% mark..n for that I'll have to painstakingly attend each n every class,my worst nightmare...Ok forget about that as I can go on n on about it....so my sir started taking attendance,everything was fine until roll number 39..then he said "rool nember farty! ..fart one..fart two.."so on till the last number.The best part was when the students had to respond to their numbers..Oh Gawd!! I just died laughing!


Next period is genetics and this mam of mine dresses up in the most hideous way possible complete with super oily hair and ghastly gold rimmed glasses(most of the times she wears lenses but once in a while decides to torture us with her annoying glasses) and she wears the same salwar kurta 3 times a week atleast..she's got these droopy eyes which invaribly make me sleepy the moment I set my eyes on her..On top of that she speaks in the same tone throughout the lecture..I miss my bed very badly during her period,no lullaby can have this effect on me the way her lecture does,its like an instant cure for imsomnia,I wish I could capitalise on that,many people suffering from sleep disorders will thank me for it and I could become filthy rich..All of a sudden she screams "Hey you!!How dare you sleep in my class??Go wash your face n come!!" I'm jolted out of my dreamless stupor but she wasn't talking to me..it was another classmate of mine who hadn't yet perfected the art of sleeping with eyes wide open..I'm a pro at it...Poor thing was so sleepy that she couldn't sit still..her head would periodically go down as if burdened by tremendous amount of weight n suddenly come back to its original position..this happened for quite some time until my mam decided that she had had enough of her rhythmic siesta..Washing of faces has almost become a ritual in her class..Almost everytime someone or the other is asked to do it..my turn hasn't come yet..thankfully!


The next period is English.This lady thinks she knows everything but the sad truth of her life is that she doesn't know an iota of the language she is supposed to be teaching to us..She comes to the class with a big grin on her face and after she's done flirting with the guys,which lasts for about 15 min minimun,she decides to do something more purposeful in the class..and what does she do? She makes us write an essay on-'Reasons for conflict among people within and outside the country' I had never heard of such a bizzare topic for an essay ever before..Her weird way of pronouncing certain words will stay with me forever,for instance," Odey to a night'ANGLE'" That was supposed to be 'Ode to a Nightingale by John Keats'. I was flabbergasted to say the least and the way I controlled my laughter when she said that is something I can never forget..my face had become red because I was not able to control my laughter but somehow managed to do it..There are many more things,like for 'eccentric' she says 'essentrik'; 'embalmed' is'yem-baallmed' so on n so forth..And she once asked who's the leading lady of the movie"Pride n Prejudice" just when I was about to answer(I took some time because I was too busy sleeping), she said and I qoute " the ledding laidee of dee picture yees Kyra Brightly!" Now what to do say to something like that?


The last period for that day-Physical Chemistry..This lady lecturer of mine is 55 going on 16..The way she dresses up to coll can put any girl my age,to shame.Everything is colour coordinated in her outfit-right from the colour of her saree,necklace,earings,rubberband,sandals down to the nail polish..everything is matching-matching! Well one might argue that what's age gotta to do with it? But lemme put it this way..You are a lecturer in a coll..would you wear a black saree with heavy zardosi work and eaqually intricate blouse,complete with black-stone jewellery and even black nail polish? Its a coll for heaven's sake not a wedding!! I wonder how she would dress up for a wedding..and if that was not enough..one can easily notice how much cheap dye she appiles to hair everyday..One thing I cant understand about her is that when she takes so many pains to dress up each day,cant she apply the dye to her hair properly??..The outer layer of her hair is black whereas its all greyish orange inside.Another thing with this lady is, she wants to show off how much english she knows and how much in sync she is with today's generation..that's heights of delusion! We call her Basanti(of Sholay) because of the way she talks,she always sounds constipated to me because of the way she stresses at each n every syllable in a word,for example the word is'alpha' n she says"aaaaaaaalllphuhhhhh!!" it sounds as though she's having an orgasm in the class!! I really cant say whether she speaks that way on purpose..but yeah,I have a nice time laughing with my tongue placed firmly in my cheek ;)


That's about it..There are many things that I dint mention about many other lecturers of mine because it'll get too long and I dont have any patience to write about this anymore.

"Innocence Re-lived"

I couldn't think of a better title for Taare Zameen Par..To say that it touched my heart would be a gross understatement! Kudos to Aamir Khan for coming up with such a gem of a movie...I'm still reeling under the magical spell of the movie..it just stays with you even after u walk out of the theatre-a sign of an excellent movie..
I,in my enitre life of 19 years,have never cried so much while watching a movie..infact i was on the verge of a breakdown..i'm not exagerrating..its true! The subtle display of various human emotions just bowled me over!
The movie is about Ishaan Avasthi(Darshan Safary-simply phenomenal)..a third standard kid who is dyslexic but his parents n teachers are totally unaware of it..as a result he is pushed around,made fun of,scolded at,bullied, and what not..
the frustrations he goes through bring tears to your eyes..no one understands him,no one bothers to actually..his parents are worried sick,wondering why is he so irresponsible when it comes to studies..completely opp to his elder brother,who is a school topper i.e, an "ideal" boy..but ishaan is total whacko! who loves everything but books..his innate talent to paint wonderful things is considered useless..he always fails in all subjects in school no matter how hard he might have tried..the list is endless...
He is sent away to a boarding school as a punishment..he worsens over there..he stops indulging in his fav pastime of painting...shuts himself up giving up all hopes..dats wen Ram Shankar Nikumbh( Aamir khan-flawless as usual) enters his life and discovers his problem..how he turns his life around is the crux of the remaining movie...
The character of Ishaan is a very well written role..you can find glimpses of Calvin(of Calvin and Hobbes) in him when he allows to take a sneak peek inside his boisterous imagination..his bubbling enthusiasm about life in its various colours is infectious..his unique perception of the world in its myriad forms forces you to think out of the box..he makes you feel elated and sad at the same time..he makes you feel his angst and joy effortlessly..his innocent vulnerability makes you cry, and you wonder where has all the innocence dissappeared from your life..
This movie made me re-visit my childhood...I laughed and cried with Ishaan,empathising with all his emotions and feelings..every scene,every moment touches you in ways unimaginable..I cried with tears of sadness and joy..something which I thought was never possible but I was proved wrong and how beautifully..
Every single person who has or will watch the movie will take away something from it..it'll be different for different people...thats where its beauty lies..and this movie will stay close to my heart for a long time to come..

"Tryst with traffic"

"Red....yellow(blinking).....GREEN!!!!" and off i go..vroooom..on my nearly 6 years old scooty...feeling proud and amazingly independent..the intangible feeling of being free simply indescribable..it just has to be experienced to be understood..and i sure am loving it.
My first memory of being on any kind of a bike was when i was around 2 or 3 years old when my dad used to make me sit in front of the hero honda we had back then..i used to wear these little frocks and the moment my dad would lift me up to make me sit on the bike,i would cringe because the steel was icy cold..and then i used to stare at that shiny circle..which i later realised was the place where the petrol was put in..but for me it was a fascinating work of art..most of the time i would go on pressing it,hitting it,wondering what it does..but to my utter dismay it never did anything out of the ordinary except giving me sore hands..but i used to love the feeling of gushing wind in my hair.. eyes watering,my legs and thighs numb with cold and my dad behind me like a huge rock..i wish i could go back..but alas! we have a long way to go before a time machine can materialse..
Coming back to the present...not so long ago(read a few months ago) i was this person who was paranoid about driving on the roads thanks to some not so pleasant experiences on the road..like getting hit by a speeding motorist who dint care a damn as he was busy yakking away on the cellphone..and if that wasn't enough,he glares at me as though its entirely my fault! Here i am with a bleeding foot wondering what just happened and this guy simply gives me a angry look without a slightest hint of remorse or guilt for what he did to me and leaves..leaving me confused and angry!
After that incident i had totally given up on the prospect of driving a two wheeler..i would console myself thinking that i would drive a car instead.Everyone in my house including my younger bro can drive a two wheeler and i would be the butt of all jokes regarding my driving skills! And then finally one day..I found my Messaih in the form of my cousin who had enough faith in me to give me her brand new activa to drive..She was more enthusiastic than me,for i had casually mentioned that i wanted to learn how to drive a two wheeler..that's it! She was adamant that i start driving directly on the road,mind you..it was 8:30 in the night and roads near my granma's place have a lot of traffic..but she wouldn't listen..finally she managed to coax me into doing the unthinkable i.e, make me drive on the road yet again..I was totally overwhelmed,all the unpleasant thoughts entered my head..but the amount of confidence she showed in me,gave me the courage to venture out on the road one more time.. At first i thought i wouldn't last a minute and wanted to give up then n there but the encouraging look on my cousin's face did the trick..Poor thing had to literally stop all the traffic on the road to make come out..and it worked!! Once i was on the road..all my fears dissappeared! it was like magic! i never thought it could be so easy..
And here i am today going to the college on my own,on my two wheeler.. much to the surprise and envy of my friends all because of my"Driver's messaih"( that's what i call her these days) This brings a larger issue to my mind..i cant recall the number of times i gave up on certain ideas of mine thinking that it wouldn't work out..but now i know that impossible is nothing if you have a little faith in yourself and others around you :)
And and and..i love calling myself a "biker girl!!" hehehe.. :D

Part 3

Ok..its been a reeeeeeeeeeally long time since i last blogged..i must admit i even forgot dat it existed..hehe..lol..
i had to go through my previous 2 posts to recollect where i had left off..turns out dat we had successfully, after lots of trials n tribulations,entered the train..the moment i entered i remember the foul smell dat was comin frm the bathroom there.."wat a way to start the journey!!" i thot...we were all pushin and shovin each other intentionally and unintentionally thanx to our over sized n over packed bags..hehe..it was fun..then finally made it to our seats..all the while one cud hear our nervous parents givin us last minute instructions frm the train windows..i can never forget those paranoid looks on their faces..finally after repeated gudbyes n countless promises made by us dat we wud take care of ourselves the train finally moved..wat a moment dat was!! dats wen it finally hit us..we were actually goin somewhere without our parents...just us friends..it was exhillarating!! some of my friends already started missin their folks back home!! one of my friends was like..i've never slept alone without my sis n mom(she's the youngest in the family) n dat triggered off a series of "i miss my mom,my dad,my bro my whole family" jargon...i got affected too..so even i started missin them although we had not yet crossed da boundary of our beloved hyderabad!! i wondered how we wud survive 5 full days without our families....
suddenly my friend sandhya called my name and i awoke frm my thoughtful stupor..it was decided dat we wud all start playin antakshari..n we did..we had so much fun playin..all of us were screamin at the top of our lungs..suddenly one of the guys..(oh i almost forgot to mention we were a group of 25 people of which there were just 4 guys..just 4!! we were wonderin y did they even bother to come..wen it was gonna be a girls show all da way) came to us n asked us to sing softly as there was a heart patient in the bogey..n the look on his face was not very cheerful..we decided to lower our voices..but after a while we got bored n i started feelin hungry..it was 8:30..all da bags dat my friends had brought including mine had many things to eat..n i was gettin tempted..but they all asked me to shut up sayin dat they wud not eat before 10!! since the majority always wins..i had to stay put..then our mam came up to us n said dat we had to finish eatin fast as the lights wud be put off my 9:30..dat was my moment!! a moment i'll always cherish!!afterall i was havin the last laugh!! i gave them this look which said"i told u so!!" but had to stop immediately coz they all stared at me as though they wud thrash me if i dint stop laughin at them..though i had to stiffle my laughter a lot..i still cherish dat moment..hehehe..
we had some delicious pulihora(lemon rice) which was very nicely packed into individual packets, we also had bobbatlu or bakshalu as my friend called it( well i dunno how to explain it..its called puranpoli in maharashtra...it something like a stuffed chapathi where the stuffing is sweet) it was lipsmackingly good..there was an elderly couple with us..they wanted to sleep n we had to oblige..so most of the lights were put off n the berths were set..now the "battle of the berths" began...