The Great Indian Terror Tamasha-"The Unforgettable Tour"

RATING SCALE:

Excellent:*****
Good:****
Above average:***
Tolerable:**
Useless:*

CAST:The members of the newly formed IM(Indian Mujahideen).
DIRECTOR(S): SIMI-Students of Islamic Movement of India.
PRODUCER(S): 1)Hizb ul Mujahideen(HM)
2)Inter Services Intelligence(ISI)
3)Lashkar-e-Taiba/Lashkar-e-Toiba/Lashkar-e-Tayyaba/Lashkar-e-Tayyiba/
Lashkar-i-Taiba (LeT)
4)Al-Qaeda/al-Qaida/al-Qa`ida/al-Qa`idah.
(If there are any other possible combinations known to the above mentioned names of the organisations,the readers are most welcome to enlighten us.)

If the name of any other terrorist organisation has been left out,then the error is seriously regretted as there is severe constraint of space to mention all.A note of apology will be sent to those organisations whose names could not specified here.

PRESENT VENUE: New Delhi
Connaught Place,Greater Kailash M Block market,Ghaffar market in Karol Bagh.
TIME: Began at 6pm as usual on weekends.

The hugely popular theatre play "Great Indian Terror Tamasha" began its much anticipated Delhi-leg of the performance on September 13 after gaining immense notoriety in Hyderabad,Jaipur,Bangalore,Ahmedabad and Surat.They give a stellar performance,leaving you in awe over their power to strike in the one of the most secure cities of the country,the capital!
The play starts as usual like the other cities previously witnessed,at around 6 in the evening on weekends,ensuring a good audience for the play.The play begins with various men going around in the city and planting numerous "low intensity" bombs(a cocktail of ammonium nitrate,gun powder,ball bearings and nails,with timer devices) covered in plastic bags invariably placed in a garbage dump or behind a hoarding.The expertise of making these bombs has only shown that repeated practice leads to better execution and this teaches us that important lesson in life!The USP of the play is the practice of sending the "terror email" either a few minutes before or after the blasts to the local media,teasing the officials to try and stop them which showcases their attempt at black humour.The brouhaha over Kenneth Haywood's unceremonious exit from the country and his eventual return provided a much needed dimension and depth to the play in its previous performance in Ahmedabad, bringing about a touch of technological advancement,which shows that they make sure that they give us their best performance every single time by constantly improving themselves.
This time around the twist in the play came in the form a 11 year old boy who claims to have seen the terrorists.The investigation as usual will reach a dead end but this new development has brought about a much needed sense of suspense though the ending eventually will be the same,that being the terrorists running around scot-free enabling them to prepare to enthrall us once again next time.We sure seem to love them! The Govt as a follow up to their act tightens the security in other cities across the country declaring 'red-alerts' for a few days and then the "SPIRIT" of the affected city is appreciated for living their lives as if absolutely nothing has happened!
Looking at the immense popularity gained by this,certain television productions are toying with the idea of adapting it into the small screen.The possible names for the shows could be "Kyunki Terrorism Bhi Kabhi Shocking Tha" "Kahani Tere Mere Bomb Blast Ki" Some reality TV shows are coming up with the idea of educating the youth about the uses of WiFi.Many new books have arrived on the market on this issue,the recent best seller being "How to Diffuse a Bomb on Your Own-A simple and effective way to diffuse the bombs without the need of the over worked bomb diffusal squad" This book was a instant hit in Surat!
After this recent performance,many big companies are contemplating with the idea of coming up with "Terror" memorabilia which includes various action figures of Osama bin laden,Al Zawahiri etc and guidebooks on how to adjust to various bandhs and curfews.
This shows how terrorism has touched our lives and become an integral part of it.Lets wait and watch for their next mode of action as this "Unforgettable Tour" doesnt seem to be in a hurry to end soon.


RATING:****(there is always scope for further improvement)

Readers can send their comment to apathetic_assholes@socalledtruespirit.com
This article was brought to you by your favourite "Twiddling Thumbs of India(TTI)"

Who Am I? Or Rather..What Am I?

I was asked this very interesting question yesterday which required me to identify myself with a particular object..it could be anything from the clear blue sky,the sea,a diary to a humble pani puri..It was a very innocent question but unfortunately I dint have an easy answer at that time..
It opened up a gamut of possibilities in my mind,a very enjoyable experience,as I had to find something analogous to my personality..Trying to achieve this is a little tough as you are required to find similitude between something palpable from the physical world and something as intangible as someone's persona.But I think I fairly succeeded when the answer dawned upon me this evening..
What I identify with is the "Rain forest".Well technically its not a single thing but I shall take that liberty as I've considered the entire forest as a single entity.
Now I shall attempt at drawing parallels between the rainforest and myself:
When you take a bird's-eye view of the rain forest what do you see? You'll see a vast expanse of land covered with lush green trees spread over thousands of miles..there is only one dominant colour-Green.But only when you take the pain of exploring it,you realise that there are many more things hidden inside that vast green facade..there are many exotic animals,,rivers flowing,,insects and birds thriving etc etc.There are many undiscovered species too.
Its very much the same with me..if you dont know me personally,you will draw your own conclusions about me based on which facet of my personality you've seen,conveniently labelling me as "aloof,sombre or snobbish." I get that a lot.Probe a little more and you'll realise there are more things to me than just that,a fact most of my friends will vouch for..
But everything is not always hunky-dory with rainforests.There are instances when they were totally devasted with forest fires or subjected to massive deforestation.But even after a devasting forest fire which might have wiped out the whole forest,with time the entire forest resurrects itself.Only this time there might be new trees and new species as well,a sign of evolution.
I have faced situations in life akin to forest fires but that has only made me a better person,someone who changes with time but at the same time retains her identity.
My answer might change from rainforest to something else if posed with same question 10 years from now in the future as the adage goes"Only thing constant in this world is change" and I couldnt agree more.

Borrowed Decisions

"What is it that you want to become when you grow up? Someone asked me this question for the first time in class 2.. It so happened that I had painted a nice fish in the art class that day for which I got 3 stars and I was mighty pleased with myself. So I said "Painter" without batting an eyelid,not realising that such a career option would be considered nothing less than blasphemy later on in life..
I distinctly remember some of my classmates giving equally,if not more, interesting answers like 'Sailor','Magician','Florist'etc etc..There were some who wanted to become 'Superman' or 'He-man' and there were some girls who were fascinated with barbie dolls and wanted to own a house like one of those doll houses(I admit,even I was crazy abt dolls then.)
So you see..even though some of the answers given were absolutely ridiculous,no one objected coz we were just kids and the answers given were something which were very honest and our own.
Yesterday,after I had just finished my dance class and was on my way out, a little girl stopped me(she's the sister of one of the students in my class)she me gave a toffee,I smilingly accepted and thanked her.Then she asked me "Are you in college?"
I replied in the affirmative.She smiled and then asked " Are you studying in Sri Chaitanya college or Narayana college?Have you finished your BiPC?" (that's bio,physics,chem) I was surprised that she knew about it because she was hardly 6 years old.I told her that I had finished it long time ago and I was presently doing BSc.She had a puzzled look on her face and then asked me "What do you want to do when you grow up?" I was amused at her innocent question and said 'Scientist'.She got even more confused.Now I asked her what she would want to become when she grew up,she said mechanically 'doctor' I asked her why had she made that choice and she said "Because my sister is doing BiPC too and I want to be like her"
All the way back home I was wondering about that little girl and was remembering the day when I was first asked this question..and then I recalled my days as a student in intermediate when I was taken into the "MBBS-Engineer" phenomenon.I was told back then that life is not worth living if you are not a doctor after taking up BiPC.Those days were hard,I experienced some of my darkest moments then.But I ultimately realised that medicine was not the thing for me and the rest they say is history.
I may not be succesful yet but I know I will be happy in my chosen vocation.The decisions I make,whether right or wrong,will be mine and mine alone.I hope the same for the little girl too.

"Innocence Re-lived"

I couldn't think of a better title for Taare Zameen Par..To say that it touched my heart would be a gross understatement! Kudos to Aamir Khan for coming up with such a gem of a movie...I'm still reeling under the magical spell of the movie..it just stays with you even after u walk out of the theatre-a sign of an excellent movie..
I,in my enitre life of 19 years,have never cried so much while watching a movie..infact i was on the verge of a breakdown..i'm not exagerrating..its true! The subtle display of various human emotions just bowled me over!
The movie is about Ishaan Avasthi(Darshan Safary-simply phenomenal)..a third standard kid who is dyslexic but his parents n teachers are totally unaware of it..as a result he is pushed around,made fun of,scolded at,bullied, and what not..
the frustrations he goes through bring tears to your eyes..no one understands him,no one bothers to actually..his parents are worried sick,wondering why is he so irresponsible when it comes to studies..completely opp to his elder brother,who is a school topper i.e, an "ideal" boy..but ishaan is total whacko! who loves everything but books..his innate talent to paint wonderful things is considered useless..he always fails in all subjects in school no matter how hard he might have tried..the list is endless...
He is sent away to a boarding school as a punishment..he worsens over there..he stops indulging in his fav pastime of painting...shuts himself up giving up all hopes..dats wen Ram Shankar Nikumbh( Aamir khan-flawless as usual) enters his life and discovers his problem..how he turns his life around is the crux of the remaining movie...
The character of Ishaan is a very well written role..you can find glimpses of Calvin(of Calvin and Hobbes) in him when he allows to take a sneak peek inside his boisterous imagination..his bubbling enthusiasm about life in its various colours is infectious..his unique perception of the world in its myriad forms forces you to think out of the box..he makes you feel elated and sad at the same time..he makes you feel his angst and joy effortlessly..his innocent vulnerability makes you cry, and you wonder where has all the innocence dissappeared from your life..
This movie made me re-visit my childhood...I laughed and cried with Ishaan,empathising with all his emotions and feelings..every scene,every moment touches you in ways unimaginable..I cried with tears of sadness and joy..something which I thought was never possible but I was proved wrong and how beautifully..
Every single person who has or will watch the movie will take away something from it..it'll be different for different people...thats where its beauty lies..and this movie will stay close to my heart for a long time to come..

To cry or not to cry..

I was watchin this movie "300" yesterday( some scenes were too gory for me so i simply walked out of the room n it was many times i did dat...an advantage of watchin movies in the convenience of ur home..)
It had a very interesting story..many would say inspirational..but dats just the superficial analysis..while watchin this movie i got an oppurtunity to take a sneek peek into the mind of a man..a man who believes dat love is a sign of weakness,crying is an act of cowardice and expressing ur feelings is the deed of the faint hearted ... In short,any man found exhibiting any of the above mentioned traits was not considered manly enough..To put it in the other way...only a man who shows no fear when faced with his worst adversary,who never expresses his feelings no matter what..who would never ask for help no matter how badly he needs it..and most important of all..who considers a woman a weaker sex..One can argue dat it was a period film where such notions existed..I completely agree..but if u look around, such men form a large chunk of today's so called modern society..
At the risk of being sounding feminist,lets examine this word "weaker sex"
If u say dat in terms of physical strength,then yes there is some amount of truth in dat statement and i have no qualms in admitting dat but then again,its not entirely correct and i have women like karnam malleshwari to corroborate my arguement although i admit its more of an exception than the norm..so u see dat statement isn't apt anymore..infact its the other way round..
Women can cry whenever they feel the need for it but a man cant thanks to the society,for such men aren't considered "macho"..a woman can freely express her feelings,her emotions,her fears etc but then again majority of the men cant,even if they want to,they wont..they think such things are "girly"..actually i can go on n on like this but ultimately my point is simple..in this rapidly changing and evolving society there is a desperate need to eliminate such ancient regressive conventions about manlihood after all just being physically strong and emotionally blocked isn't what defines a true man..a real man is someone who accepts change,who accepts himself for who he is,doesn't mind sharing his feelings with people close to him and most importantly considers women as equals..
I am writin this because i felt really sorry for all those men in the movie nad also also in our society...i mean whether u like it or not,sometimes crying ur heart out(ofcourse dat doesn't mean one should turn into a crybaby..hehe..) or sharing ur feelings with ur close friends is a huge relief and u always end up feelin much better..this has been considered as a sign of weakness for generations but if u ask me..its a sign of strength,coz it gives u courage to accept ur weaknesses and failures..and not many men can do dat and i feel truly sorry for them,for they lead a life of "false pride" and end up living a clastrophobic life..
So here i am sippin my cup of coffee(its cold now,thanks to all this typing..) and humming the song "strength of a woman" by shaggy..nice song..and i think i should go and heat up my coffee...

My Lovely Garden

I live in modern day apartments...so where's the question of having a garden?? Good point...but i have an interesting answer...
I was watching this debate on TV about beauty being skin deep..it was very thought provoking.Though i've always maintained that more than just superficial attractiveness its important to be beautiful inside..it sounds cliched as many people say that but nobody ever mentions how can one achieve that elusive "inner beauty"I gave it a thought and came up with a solution..."Garden" now one can wonder what a garden has got to do with it...but it does..coz i'm not talkin abt any ordinary garden...its a very special one..a garden which everyone can build and nurture even the ones living in apartments like me...how?...simple..
When we enter a garden,we are surrounded by many kinds of plants..in the same way just imagine that u have garden inside your mind where instead of plants there are several different thoughts and feelings...each different thought represents a plant...Now its upto you as to what kind of plants would u like to have in your garden..and once you decide you'll be surprised how many possibilities u can come up with...sounds confusing?...let me give u glimpse of my garden...
Its a very interesting garden coz u'll find all kinds of plants(thoughts)..I, being a typical Aquarian, am very unpredictable...i keenly observe the feelings of people and try to comprehend their various reactions to different kinds of situations...and this has helped me in being less judgemental , more understanding and tolerent.Its not easy, but i try, as i dont want any bad plants in my garden..Then there is this side of me that's still a child who loves cartoons,ice creams,choclates and nursery rhymes..(i hum nursery rhymes when i'm alone)...And there is this part where i'm like any other typical teenager doing everything that any ordinary person my age would do for example listen to music...now music is a huge amalgamation of various genres as i listen to any kind of music depending on my mood...
So on and so forth...mind u, i havent shown the whole garden as its too huge and yes, too personal.I am an assortment of several different thoughts, emotions,dreams and ambitions.
So this is how you build a garden,a garden which is full of lovely plants it could be flowering plants or cactii..the choice is yours...but remember it needs a lot of care and nurture and then one day it will transform into something truly beautiful and bring you true happiness..
Happy gardening...

Not A Girl Not Yet A Woman

This is what Brittney Spears crooned a few years ago,and this is precisely my situation right now.Brittney Spears has herself transformed from a girl to a woman though not very succesfully if you ask me but she did it nevertheless and so will I,after all its only a matter of time....

My servant maid got married 2months ago,I remember my mum giving her some sarees and jewellery.I cant forget the sheer happiness on her face when she took them.My mom was feeling sad because she could no longer work for us as she would now live in her husband's village,my mom simply adored her....as for me.. I felt really weird because she was all of 18 years ready to settle in holy matrimony....and i have just turned 19 a few days ago.I wondered what it would be like to get married at such a young age.....for I still watch cartoons
A few days ago my mom came rushing into my room and told me that Anita had died.I gasped...then I wondered who Anita was... I asked my mom.....she was none other than my young 18 year old servant maid...
Her husband had killed her for dowry.We learnt that he had been harrasing her from day one....(I hope her husband gets hanged for such a heinous crime) Though I never really talked to her when she worked at our place.. I felt as though i had lost a friend...she was somebody who was my age but was very different from me...she lived in a world very much different from mine..I always saw a silent strength in her which is rare and that is why her death made me very sad.
She was just a girl who was forced to become a woman too soon...i'm sure she was a good wife or atleast she might have tried to be one but her life ended a little too soon...
Though her life was a short one..she will be remembered by me forever coz looking at her always made me feel damn lucky for living a life that i am and I am very grateful for that....and I'm still humming Brittney's song...